jeudi 1 janvier 2009

Love Expection

There is so many things that I would like to share with my loved one and yet it feel like the time is moving on so fast. Each moment is unique and we are trying to make them each exceptional for they might stay craved in our memory for a very long time.

Sadly, things don’t always go as planned; we each got our up and down from time to time. Some times we wonder what is wrong…perhaps it’s us? However, most of the time it’s an influence from an outside source, something barely visible to the human eyes but that take a lot of space in our subconscious mind. Unfortunately, until we completely defeat this demon, we will have a hard time to focus on thing that we really hold dear.

Those demons will even blind you, using sadness, rage and anger in order to forget what you cherish and love. That is why that I think about life as a giant virtual game. If I cannot gain pleasure from something, I usually “suppress” or forget about it and move on to something else. Because of this, I am rarely serious or angry at anything.

Today I seen about how important is love expectation from your partner. I think it’s important enough to add it to the three relation aspects I named earlier in my blog: Physical, psychological and shared interest. No relations are perfect, and no matter what, we will have to sacrifice some thing in order to gain something else.

Love is often about sacrifice, a gain for a pain. The true question is, are you both willing to go through those sacrifices in order to love each others? Will the gain excess the pain in the end? And more importantly, would you gain more from being alone or with someone else? Those kinds of questions, when resolved, are what will keep or break lover’s relationship.

Also, keep in mind that nothing is perfect, you will meet deception from time to time even with an ideal partner and some situations will bring you pain and sadness no matter your choice.

lundi 29 décembre 2008

Marie-Helene Journey at Home

It’s been already 3 days that we have been together, me and Marie-Helene. Every second that I am in her presence fill me with joy. She is so much more wonderful than I could ever imagine… it’s like a dream coming true.

I also feel a bit strange lately, some things like a headache or a pain in my heart. It’s a strange sensation that I can hardly understand or explain. It seems that I easily feel guilty of everything around me, particularly when it involves her. I want the impossible… I want her to be happy forever… but I am just a mortal, a human, an animal.

She is sleeping on my bed right now. So beautiful and peaceful… I love her pretty visage, her little closed eyes and mouth…her long hair… her slowly breathing. I could stare at her forever.

I wonder what she is dreaming about… Hopefully it will be nice dream with me inside! All I can hope is that I did not deceive her so far. I am certainly not perfect but I think she is worth only the best of the best and so I must do my best for myself and her. There is so much that I would like to do with her but then again, she might want some time for herself. I love you so much my dearest, but I don’t want you to feel like I am a weight at your ankle either.

I also noticed that I probably need much more attention and affection than anyone some time. If it was of me, she would pretty much always be in tight my arms and I would kiss her about every where! But of course, I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable either. Perhaps I worry too much…One thing for sure, every time I see her smiling back at me, her lovely eyes staring at my soul, it make my heart beat faster than ever and stop any pain I might feel.

XXX